Most girlfriends knit their boyfriends things like scarves and hats for winter. I’m an engineer, so I took a traditionally warm, fuzzy, and comforting material and made… a line graph. This work is based on flight logs and plots portions of the first year in a relationship that is and always has been long-distance; I’m yellow, he’s blue, the horizontal axis is time, and the vertical distance is proportional to the geographic gap (on a logarithmic scale). We were pretty secretive about the fact that we were dating for a long time (mostly due to my paranoia), which is why you’ve got to stoop to read the first part; it comes up to eye level at the point in time we ceased to hide it. And yes, we travel a lot.
The installed work, which wraps around two walls of the gallery, pre-performance.
A closer look at the first wall pre-performance, which details the first few months we started dating. On the far left you can see us flying in from Germany (top) and China (bottom) for our first date in North Carolina, and the visits and business trips back and forth (the large dip in the middle is from when I flew to Cape Town, South Africa to teach a workshop).
A closer look at the second wall pre-performance, which spans the time our relationship went public. On the far left you can see me flying to the Philippines for the holidays before my boyfriend heads to Germany to do the same. We then meet in Berlin and travel together (mostly for work) through a long stretch during which our relationship stops being undercover; the remaining trips and conferences in the early spring are shown at eye level.
I’m deaf, and we’re both computer geeks who work remotely, so we’ve historically bridged the miles with text; you’ll see it filling the distance between us, but in the words of other writers who’ve covered the topic of separation (sorry, you don’t get to see our emails and letters and text messages and chat logs). He’s German and I’m Chinese-Filipino-American, so the text is… not always in English, nor always in the original language the quote was written in. There’s a story hidden in each stretch. If you find me, I might tell you some of them.
There was a short performance art segment the day after installation when I handwrote the quotes in charcoal. This selection is from the book "The Little Prince," and translates to "'I have,' said the Fox, 'the color of the wheat won.'" More quotes and their English translations are at the end of the post.
A number of song lyrics about long-distance relationships were used as well, in this case a passage from a James Taylor piece. You can also see the airport codes written faintly on the wall in red to mark the travel paths we took. This section shows my brief trip to Boston (BOS) and return to Raleigh (RDU), then us traveling together to Dallas (DFW) for a longer stretch and from there to Raleigh again.
Another stretch of text on the wall, close-up. The yarn used is thick roving, doubled up and twisted to become even thicker. It's tacked in place with small picture nails that disappear into the yarn, but sometimes (as above) you can see where the pieces of yarn are spliced together.
The quote at the very end of the second stretch of wall. A full translation appears at the end of this post.
Quotes used in the piece from various songs, all originally in English.
Another aeroplane / Another sunny place / I’m lucky, I know / But I wanna go home (Home by Canadian singer Michael Buble)
If you choose the time / we can catch the moon / oh, I’ll see you there (The Same Moon by American singer James Taylor)
All my bags are packed, I’m ready to go / I’m standing here outside your door / I hate to wake you up to say goodbye (Leaving On A Jet Plane by American singer John Denver)
Traditional sayings used in the piece.
Absence makes the heart fonder.
Out of sight, out of mind.
Quotes used in the piece from The Prophet by Khalil Gibran – originally in English as shown:
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.
When you part from your friend, you grieve not; For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain.
Quotes used in the piece from The One And Future King by T. H. White – originally in English as shown.
“The best thing for being sad,” replied Merlyn, beginning to puff and blow,”is to learn something. That is the only thing that never fails. You may grow old and trembling in your anatomies, you may lie awake at night listening to the disorder of your veins, you may miss your only love, you may see the world about you devastated by evil lunatics, or know your honour trampled in the sewers of baser minds. There is only one thing for it then — to learn. Learn why the world wags and what wags it… That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting.”
Quotes used in the piece from Der Kleine Prinz or The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery – originally in French, shown here in German with English translations in italics.
“Die Zeit, die du für deine Rose verloren hast, sie macht deine Rose so wichtig.” – “The time, that you for your rose have lost, it makes your rose so important.”
“Ich habe,” sagte der Fuchs, “die Farbe des Weizens gewonnen.” – “I have,” said the fox, “the color of the wheat won.”
Quotes used in the piece from Der Alchimist or The Alchemist by Paolo Coelho – originally in Portuguese, shown here in German with English translations in italics.
“Ohne jemals verstanden zu haben, daß die Liebe niemals jemanden hindert, seine innere Bestimmung zu erfüllen. Wenn das nämlich passiert, dann war es nicht die wahre Liebe, die, welche die Sprache der Welt spricht.” - “Without ever having understood that love never hinders one from fulfilling one’s intrinsic destiny. If this comes to pass, then it was not the true love, that which speaks the Language of the World.”
“Maktub,” fügte sie hinzu. “Wenn ich ein Teil deiner Bestimmung bin, dann wirst du eines Tages wiederkommen.”- “Maktub,” she added. “If I am part of your destiny, then you will one day come back.”
And yes, it’s been worth every minute.
